Current Events... In the News!

Could this Dick Cheney Super Top Secret Assassination Ring of Killers news story be any more right up my alley? For one thing, I don't very much like Dick Cheney and would give my prized peacock collection to see him disgraced and shown to be an even more villainous monster than he already appears to be. For another thing, I love things that are super top secret and conspiratorial and assassiny.

And I like rings!

Here's the story

How come Sy Hersh is the only person on earth who gets these kinds of stories?

Anyway this is awesome. This is like when the rogue cop, out for justice no matter what his commander says, starts getting a little too effective against those nasty mobsters, and the gruff commander tells him "lay off!" and then the FBI guys show up like "lay off!" and "This is our show!" and then the guy is like "go suck an egg!" and then he totally commits acts of justice like arresting those mobsters and sending them to prisons. Except in this case the rogue cop is just going directly to the mobster's house and murdering him, and he's actually officially not on the police force, and he cannot be prosecuted, and who even knows if the mobster was really in the mob.

One hopes the people that they murdered were actually really, really bad. That way, we can be excited about all the nefariousness and Cheney's downfall without having to feel too shitty about the fact that our nation was going around killing people that didn't deserve killing. I want to be outraged because of undemocratic-ness and abuse of power, but still have fun with it, y'know?

But the line about collateral damage doesn't look too good.

In other current events in the news, there was a baby hippo at this zoo in Switzerland and they didn't have room for it and they were going to FEED THE BABY HIPPO TO A TIGER.

And then they decided not to.